A fun fact about me: I love television. Yesterday, I was watching one of my favourite shows, Grey’s Anatomy, which is a drama that combines the characters’ personal lives with supposedly accurate medical drama. In the episode I watched yesterday, a character named Meredith, made a poor surgical decision, and, because her husband was also her boss that day, he was extremely angry about it. Now, because I know Meredith as a character, I know that she regretted her decision, or at least felt terrible about its result, but she faced her husband both professionally and personally without fear. In particular, it was the latter that stood out to me. See, Meredith has made several other mistakes in the past, so if I was Meredith, I would have completely shut down in terms of personal communication with my husband out of guilt as well as fear about what it would mean for our marriage.
This is a long-winded way of telling you that I have difficulty making and standing by serious decisions, as well as resolving conflict. Perhaps that is too much information to reveal on a blog that is, once again, not just mine, but I truly believe that these problems have to do with my difference. See, I have very good but very involved parents who, because they are so good, and because I am living in their home, can’t resist weighing in and assisting me in making my decisions even though I am 27 years old, and because old habits die hard, I can’t resist allowing this. I truly marvel at people, both fictional and real, who can ardently defend a decision they have made, even if they stand alone or with only one other person. As for my lack of skill in dealing with conflict, I think the reasons for this are harder to pinpoint, but it probably comes down to lack of experiences. Perhaps I have not had enough varied experience with either friends, colleagues, or strangers to learn how to masterfully deal with conflict with both grace and conviction. Perhaps these issues are unique to me, but I would not be surprised if other persons with differences struggle with one or both of these problems. I believe that whatever direction BB Squared decides to go in, this organization will only help in these areas, because our overall goal is to get people with differences more involved in the world, which inherently means more challenges, but also more opportunities to learn.